Hitting And Fighting

We need to teach our children not to hurt other children. Hitting, slapping, pinching, scratching, shoving, knocking down, hair-pulling, and biting are all unacceptable behaviors. Clarify for your child "We don't hit. We don't hurt people." Disagreements are settled by talking, not hitting. If children do fight, respond swiftly.

  • First: Intervene at the early shoving stage or when the hand is raised. Don't wait for injuries or screaming.
  • Second: Separate the children without questioning them. It doesn't matter who you see doing the hitting when you come on the scene. That hitting could be a reaction to the previous blow.
  • Third: Send both kids to time-out in separate rooms. Another option is to send one child outside. If your child's friend is aggressive at your house, time-out can consist of sending the friend home.
  • Finally: Model the type of verbal problem-solving you want your child to use when he's angry. That means no spanking and no rough-handling.

 

If you have other questions about your child's behavior, consult your healthcare provider.

Disclaimer: This information is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice. It is provided for educational purposes only. You assume full responsibility for how you choose to use this information.

Author and Senior Reviewer: Barton D. Schmitt, M.D. FAAP

Last Review: 6/1/2008

Last Revised: 6/1/2000

Copyright 1994-2008 Barton Schmitt, M.D. Parent Advice Messages.

 

Is Your Child Sick?

Pediatric HouseCalls Symptom Checker is a parent guide for treating your child at home, calling your child's doctor or seeking immediate medical attention. Developed by Dr. Barton Schmitt, MD, FAAP, a board-certified pediatrician on staff at Children's Hospital Colorado. Dr. Schmitt has developed other health tools for parents, including the 3rd edition of Your Child’s Health (available in bookstores) and KidsDoc, a new iPhone and Android app for parents (available online).

A Parent's Guide to Healthy, Happy Kids! Subscribe to have our quarterly newsletter mailed to your home.

Children's Hospital Colorado Family Health Library

Ask Kate the librarian for the health information you need!