Siblings Who Argue And Fight

Most siblings argue and bicker occasionally. When possible, stay out of it as long as it remains a verbal disagreement. Children can't go through life having a referee to resolve their differences. They need to learn how to negotiate with people. Arguing with siblings and peers provides this experience. A good rule is "Settle your own arguments but no hitting."

When you hear them arguing:

  • First: Ignore the arguing unless it involves injuries or property damage. If necessary go to a part of the house where you can't hear it.
  • Second: Try to keep your children from bringing their argument to you for an opinion. If you do become involved, only help them clarify what they're arguing about. Don't try to decide who is to blame or who started it. And let them find a solution to their problem.
  • Third: If the bickering continues and interferes with your ability to think, go to your children and tell them, "Please settle your differences quietly." If they don't change, send them both outdoors or to time-out in separate rooms. If an object such as TV is involved in the dispute, turn it off.

In summary, stay out of sibling arguments. The less you play referee, the faster they will learn to find the common ground. If you have other questions about your child's behavior, consult your healthcare provider.

Disclaimer: This information is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice. It is provided for educational purposes only. You assume full responsibility for how you choose to use this information.

Author and Senior Reviewer: Barton D. Schmitt, M.D. FAAP

Last Review: 6/1/2008

Last Revised: 6/1/2000

Copyright 1994-2008 Barton Schmitt, M.D. Parent Advice Messages.

 

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